HELP NOW WITH RELATIONSHIP ISSUES



Each of us lives in a network of relationships. For most of us these are the most important part of living. Relationships extend from superficial acquaintances through lesser and stronger friendships, work, to the most important ones with parents, siblings, children and partners. Ask yourself – what do I spend most of my time thinking about? For the majority of people the answer is ‘relationships with others’. Happy and fulfilled relationships will usually lead to a happy and fulfilled life.

 Intimate partnerships and marriage will often be the source of most joy or, when things go bad, hurt. And learning how to make intimate relationships work well is, for the majority of men and women, one of the most important tasks on our life journey. When a relationship with a partner does not go well, is threatened or perhaps ends, our suffering can be intense. A cheating or unfaithful partner, lack of emotional or sexual intimacy, lack of trust, jealousy, breakdown, separation and divorce can be some of the most difficult or traumatic events for any of us. Past relationships can intrude, recovery from a failed relationship may be difficult. The Internet sometimes introduces very disturbing elements into a partnership. And relationships can turn toxic [abusive and violent relationships are discussed separately here.] Society and family impose additional pressures on gay and lesbian partnerships.

The time of meeting, falling in love, deciding that this is the person I want to spend my life with is also often a time of great happiness. Or great pain when things don’t go well. We have to learn to make the transition from the wonderful “falling in love” stage to a healthy long-term life together.

Few of us are taught how to do relationships well – we want to ‘fix things’ but don’t know what to do. Most do not know how significant the role of our own birth family is – the rules and behaviours we learned from our mother, father and siblings. When two people give a commitment to each other they bring two different family cultures, child rearing values, spiritual or religious beliefs, attitudes towards money and world views together under one roof. A man and a woman will often think and communicate differently. Conflict is inevitable. Therapy can help build and strengthen relationships with advice on how to communicate well, set boundaries and meet one’s own life needs while respecting and caring about the life of the one you love.

Counselling can provide somewhere you can share your pain and get support in a caring place without judgement. Just talking to a therapist can provide great relief and an emotional space where your options can become clearer. Counselling and psychotherapy will give you a chance to learn better communication and to better understand yourself and the values you bring from your family of origin. If you want to work with me as a couple, therapy will allow you to talk with a husband, wife or partner more clearly and with less emotion and anger.
It is often hard to see how to save a relationship when times are difficult. It is easy to feel that the other person can’t communicate or won’t change. Therapy offers a place of hope in such difficult circumstances.

NEXT STEPS

To find out more about working with me click on any of the buttons at the top of the page (a good place to start is Home ). You can check for available appointment times here.

MY GUARANTEE

As a counsellor I know that I can help most people who come to see me, with a wide range of issues. However, the single most important factor in successful therapy is the relationship between therapist and client. You cannot know whether you will have that necessary confidence and trust until we meet. If you end your first session feeling that you haven’t been helped at all and you do not wish to return then tell me. I will gladly refund the initial fee in full, without qualification.